1) Most men don’t have a mission in life, and this is a major problem when you’re with a woman.
I’m not sure why this is, or how this is even a problem, but I guess that’s just me. I have never had a problem, never in my life, with knowing what my mission was, or what it was I was trying to accomplish at a particular time in my life.
If you call yourself a man, or would like to be thought of as one, then you NEED to get this handled, yesterday. Men absolutely positively NEED to have a purpose and a mission for their lives. Without this, they cannot really call themselves men. Women even can pick up on this instinctively, and are thus repulsed by men who do not seem to have a clear direction for their lives.
Men that don’t know what it is they want, or what they’re looking for in other words.
This makes a woman feel insecure, and unsafe. It also forces her into her masculine, which she doesn’t want to be forced into. She wants that to be a choice.
2) Exclusivity and/or a relationship must be the woman’s idea, never the man’s.
This is most common modern problem I see men get themselves into nowadays. This may not seem like a big deal, because it’s so subtle, but it’s just so damn important and true. I cannot stress it enough,
It must never, NEVER be the man’s idea, to enter into a relationship with a woman. It must NEVER EVER be his idea (or you watching this if you’re a man), to get exclusive with a particular woman. If you do this, you are cutting yourself off at the knees, and you will forever be in the position of weakness from that point forward.
She will control the frame from that point forward, and the worse part of all: is that she’ll know it. She won’t know WHY she knows it, but she will know it instinctively.
Society has done an effective job of changing this, without anyone even noticing.
They have somehow convinced men that it’s okay or is ‘’normal’’ for a man to suggest exclusivity. This is rooted in the idea that men and women are the same, so its therefore okay for either one to propose an idea like this.
I’m here to tell, it’s not. Not if you don’t want to put yourself in a dangerously compromised position.
3) Men will chase after women, & put her in the position of power (& themselves in a position of weakness).
This principle is similar to the last one, but is ultimately different. This is a law of human nature. The person who cares the least, is always the one that wields the true power in a relationship.
When you ”chase after” a woman, what that really means, is that you care more about getting and pleasing her, than she does about getting and pleasing you. It communicates this on a deep level. This will almost always happen subconsciously. As the man, you have to be the one with the power. NEVER hand this over to the woman.
Trust me guys, not only does she NOT want this power (even if she says she does), but if you know anything about the true, primal nature of women: you’ll know that sooner or later she’ll misuse this power. And she’ll misuse it against YOU.
Women are able to end relationships (even ones they’ve had for years), at the drop of dime.
They’re capable (because of how they evolved), of literally dumping you in 5 minutes, and erasing YEARS and YEARS of a history the two of you may have, and won’t even bat an eye about it. They’ll move on like nothing even ever happened. Like they never even met you, or that you ever meant anything to them.
4) Is she making things easy for you, or difficult for you?
This is a question you need to always be asking yourself. This was something that, in my youth, I would often ignore, and I paid dearly for that. I paid with my time, I paid with my wallet, I paid with my precious focus and energy. I paid with everything I have to give, all because I didn’t have someone to tell me to pay attention to this, like I’m telling you right now.
If a woman is making you jump through hoops in any way whatsoever, you need to cease all contact IMMEDIATELY. You need to back off her and whatever communication you’re having with her, IMMEDIATELY. I cannot stress this enough guys.
Women that have a high level of interest towards you, will always make things easier, they will never make things harder.
In fact: they will go out of their way, to make things easier for you. They subconsciously know that the world of modern dating is wrought with all sorts of games and bullshit. So once they realize they like you, they won’t want to be responsible for ruining things, so they’ll do all these subtle extra things, that make communicating more convenient and easy for you.
5) Be prepared to walk & never look back (chances are she’ll reach out to you, but you still have to be ready for her not to, that’s the irony of it).
When I say ”be prepared to walk” I mean that in more than just one sense. For example, I feel that statement is a bit broad and needs a little more clarification. Being prepared to walk, means in all the following contexts:
—When you’ve only been conversing with a woman for a short while (like under a few weeks).
–And this can stretch all the way to the other end of spectrum, and could mean an ex-girlfriend that broke things off with you. Maybe you thought you loved her and want her back in your life BADLY.
And anything in between these two poles.
—When you’ve only been conversing with a woman for a short while (under a few weeks):
Maybe you just met her, thought things went well, got her number, hell maybe you even had drinks with her, and now you’ve been exchanging texts. At this stage, you especially have to be prepared at all times, to come to the potential realization: this woman just has low interest. This can be tough to do if she’s a physically attractive woman. Doesn’t matter: you’re a busy man, and your mission and time is worth A LOT.
Unfortunately: women crave and love attention. They’ve always been this way, it just so happens to be worse now than its ever been in human history, thanks to technology and dating apps. There’s not really too much you can do about this, other than learn to become hyper-aware of it.
My rule is 3 strikes and you’re out. What that means is: if I meet a woman, doesn’t matter where (dating app or in person), and I make 3 solid attempts to ask her out for a drink (or coffee), she’s got 3 chances to accept my invitation without giving me the run-around, before I delete her number. I highly encourage you to be ruthless about this guys, or be prepared to have a lot of your time wasted. Don’t let her create a situation where you feel like you’re having to chase her. Give her 3 strikes, and if she’s still jerking you around after these 3 attempts you’ve made to make plans with her, then ruthlessly delete her contact information.
This will be much more common with girls you meet online, than it will with girls you day game cold approach. It will still happen in both scenarios however,
This can stretch all the way to the other end of spectrum, and could mean an ex-girlfriend that broke things off with you. Maybe you thought you loved her and want her back in your life BADLY.
This is even more true with these girls and situations, than in the 1st scenario.
You have got to be willing to not only walk away, but to actually mean it guys, otherwise it won’t work. You’ll either give yourself away if you don’t mean it, or she’ll be able to tell for another reason.
You will never get an ex back, that broke things off by ”pining” for her. She has to feel that you don’t ”need” her to come back. It shows that you have options, and that you’re therefore the one with the higher value.
Taking the L and moving on (when its the case that you really liked the girl), will often actually counterintuitively cause her to come back. Again, your ability to move on, shows that you have options, that you’re still on your purpose, and that she was only a guest in your house (your reality), not an actual part of it.
I’d love to hear about what has worked for you personally, leave your comments below.
Until next time,
-Matt Mitchell