Today, I am going to make sure we drive an important point home.
I realized this morning, that this should have been one of the major points I mentioned in my last 2 articles.
So, why is it that I feel this needs to be addressed? Well…..quite simply: because its extremely important, and more and more men these days seem to have forgotten what I’m about to outline here.
If you’re in a relationship right now, or were recently in one, then you may have noticed that any time you momentarily lost control of yourself, your woman lost a little attraction for you.
She lost a little respect for you.
I want to draw a distinction here, and point out that I don’t mean this when you’re in a situation where you need to call her out on her bad behavior. Because when you do that, most women will actually ended up gaining attraction for you.
Maybe not right away, but afterwards you may have noticed that her respect towards you improved, even if only a little bit.
The reason for this is because in their minds, women don’t see a man calling her out, or confronting her bad behavior, as a sign of weakness, women instead actually see this as a sign of strength. Women love a man that stands up for himself, for what he believes in, and that has boundaries.
They love to know that their man has boundaries. They have to know you have them actually.
Knowing that you have clear-cut boundaries, is what makes them feel secure, and safe. It can do nothing but make them respect you more.
So that’s not what I’m talking about here.
What I’m talking about here: is when a man loses his shit over any and every other situation that unfolds, that provokes an emotional reaction out of you. If she sees that you are incapable of controlling your emotions, well…..there aren’t many other signs of a failure to maintain self-control, then that one.
Women love men that have self-control, they love men that have attained self-mastery over themselves. A man cannot exert control or lead other people, if he does not first have control over himself.
Before a man can lead others, he must first lead himself.
There is no greater sign of control, or self-mastery, than a man that has almost complete control over his emotions. If she picks up on the fact that you are not moved off course by anything, and that nothing gets through to you, that nothing penetrates you, it makes her feel secure on a level that you cannot comprehend.
This is not to say that men should not deal with injustices, or tolerate disrespect, it simply means that: when they address these issues, they do so while maintaining complete self-control of their emotions.
You need to remain stoic at all times.
Do not let the bullshit distractions or wrongdoings, get through to you or disrupt your energy, or your day.
You see men…when you lose control as a man, you lose several things, here they are:
-Energy
-Willpower
-Focus
-Time
-Your limited fucks to give for that day.
Like my man Richard Cooper used to say: you only have so many fucks to give each day, so ”reserve those fucks for matters that are truly fuckworthy”.
So prioritize and manage your daily fucks.
Words of wisdom my friend, words of wisdom. We’re human, and every day we only get so much willpower, focus, time, and energy. Each of these are precious and scarce resources, and they must be safeguarded at all costs.
When you let things bother you, and you let things ”get through to you”, you are allowing these scarce, precious resources to get drained out of you.
Never put off for tomorrow what you can get done today, and you can always get more done when you’re not wasting your energy, willpower, focus, and time, on menial bullshit.
On matters that don’t deserve them.
When you allow this: you are allowing the perpetrators to win. You are accepting defeat. Women love winners, not losers, so stop letting the bullshit perpetrators of your negative emotions win.
YOU are the one in charge, ALWAYS. All the time. Not sometimes, ”not every now and then”, ALL THE TIME. As a self-centered, aligned, and masculine man: you decide what gets through to you, and what doesn’t.
It’s the subtle things like this that attractive women pick up on, and will crave you for. They won’t be able to get enough of you when you show them, over and over again, that nothing gets through to you. That nothings breaks through your wall and affects you without your consent.
You are the gatekeeper to your emotions and focus, not her, and not anything or anyone else.
When she disrespects you, you let her know you’re not going to tolerate it, but you always let her know this, while keeping your self-control, and emotions in check. But don’t do this for women guys, or for ”A” woman: do it for yourself.
You should always look out for #1: YOU.
Everything you do, you should do for you. Never do things for other people, unless you’re making the conscious CHOICE to do so. This is especially true when it comes to women. Do things for you first and foremost, and people will always respect you for that.
Over and out.
-Matt Mitchell